Influence

How to build enlightened hospitality

You can learn a lot about rapport from the hospitality business because it's often the way the business makes you feel that will bring you back. Danny Meyer launched the groundbreaking Union Square Café in New York twenty five years ago, now he is CEO of one of the world's largest restaurant organisations. His business philosophy revolves around enlightened hospitality, as Danny puts it:

"Hospitability is the foundation of my business philosophy. Virtually nothing else is as important as how one is made to feel in any business transaction. Hospitality exists when you believe the other person is on your side. The converse is just as true. Hospitality is present when something happens for you. It is absent when something happens to you. Those two simple propositions – for and to – express it all."

For enlightened hospitality to work it must be expressed to each of five key stakeholders - to each other, then to guests, community, suppliers and investors. He makes no excuses for his staff first approach because the only way he can ensure superior customer service is to ensure they are served by happy staff.

Meyer also draws a useful distinction between service and hospitality. Service is the technical delivery of the product; this is necessary but not enough. Hospitality for Meyer is "how the delivery of that product makes the recipient feel" and is more like a dialogue that involves listening and responding. To reach the top requires excellence in service and hospitality.

Have you ever wondered why a technically perfect restaurant leaves you feeling cold? Meyer uses analogy of a light bulb that gives off both heat and light. Imagine if every business was a light bulb with the primary goal of attracting as many moths as possible. In Meyer's world 49 per cent of the attraction is the light and 51 per cent of the bulb's attraction is the warmth.

To find out more about Danny Meyer and his Union Square Hospitality Group visit http://www.ushgnyc.com/ or read his excellent book Setting the Table, (Harper, New York 2008).

How to find out more about coaching

Two  years ago I started a weblog for people I coach, its full of useful resources and ideas to maximise your performance. Why not have a look at the weblog by visiting http://peteranthony.typepad.com/coaching/

Negotiating Myth #3 Always make the first offer

One great myth of negotiating is to never make an offer until they have made an offer first. This false theory suggests that you give away too much if you make the first offer. In practice the opposite is true. You are better off making the first offer in a negotiation for three reasons:

1. It acts as an anchor around which the rest of the negotiation revolves.
2. It's much easier to be bargained down than to bargain the other side up.
3. When you are making concessions you can always ask the other person for a concession too.

So next time you are negotiating be sure to make the first offers.

Negotiation Myth #2

Where there is a single issue negotiation such as at a market where you might haggle over the price of a carving, there is a fixed pie. A fixed pie means there is no chance of exploring ways of both getting more – there are only so many slices of the pie to divide. In most commercial negotiations there are three characteristics which make the pie elastic in size and desirability:

1. More than one issue
2. Each party values each issue differently
3. Interests may be complementary

An outcome can be reached by both people which is better for both than if they assumed there was a fixed pie. Many negotiators don't reach these types of agreement because they assume their interests are conflicting. The assumption of conflicting interests may also lead to devaluing concessions made by the other party since we think that "If they are conceding it to us then it can't be too valuable to them".

So make your first approach one where you attempt to work with the other person to expand your outcomes and the number of alternative ways of getting them. You will then both end up better off.

Download the Metta Negotiation Planner

Effective Strategy is key to successful negotiating, since most good deals are won in planning as much as in execution. Strategy means we must arrive at a series of potential bundles of outcomes that leave us better off than not reaching agreement. You can download the Metta approach to planning negotiations below:

Download SalesNegotiationPlanner.pdf